I love to
catch up with a friend over a cuppa and today's coffee chat is with another
amazing mom living in Leamington Spa, UK. I hear your question, 'how do you
catch up with someone, on the other side of the world, over coffee?' Well, by simply catching up 'over coffee' J. It's amazing what we can do with technology
these days but I digress. So, I had a chat with Milly, an amazing mum of two, and
among other things, she talks about finding the courage to make the huge and
difficult decision to change her career in a time when others would consider
her to be almost at the peak of her career. I found it inspiring that she felt the need for a change in her life and she fought for it and succeeded.
Who: Milly
Occupation: School Teacher
Location: Leamington Spa, UK
A bit more: I am 35, married and a mother of two. I love
reading, running, travelling and catching up with my family and friends. I am
totally dedicated to my family.
1. Pregnancy – What where the pros & cons for you?
Pros for me were excitement, expectation, joy unspeakable…
Cons were:
a.
Heartburn: remedy was ginger
tea 30 mins before I eat and not eating after 4pm.
b.
Morning sickness
c.
Painful Leg Cramps around 7
months every night in my second pregnancy: remedy walking through it; eating
bananas (midwife’s advice) to replenish potassium because this was caused by
mineral depletion with the pregnancy
2.
Tell me about a difficult
decision you have had to make and how you worked your way through it?
One
difficult decision for me was making a career change from a postdoctoral
researcher to school teaching. It all started to take shape when I returned to
work after my first child and I didn’t feel that job satisfaction any longer, in
addition, I was no longer getting excited going to work every morning. I had
always had teaching in the back of my mind as something I would love to try. So
one day I decided to get some information on how to change into a teaching
career, and after some detailed research I settled on a plan on how to ease
into this new career. It was a very challenging time as I had to do teacher
training alongside my full-time job and this involved doing assignments by 4am
on workdays and on weekends. I also used my annual holidays to do placements in
schools so I didn’t actually have a decent break during that period. However, I
was very determined to make the change because I was convinced that teaching
was my life’s calling, so I kept looking at the light at the end of the tunnel
as well as the positive impact this new career would have on my family, such as
more time for the kids, spending school holidays together, and a happier me. These kept me going through those hard times.
Now I am settling into my new career and I am very glad that I made the change.
All that hard work has paid off and I am ecstatic doing what I love and
being there for my family. I feel very fulfilled with my job, I love preparing
schoolwork for my students and seeing the transformation in them daily, and I
am excited going to work every day.
3.
Take us through your typical
workday and weekend.
No two days are the same for me. I work Mondays,
Wednesdays and Thursdays. Therefore, I have a work weekday, a stay-at-home weekday
and a weekend day. My schedule on work weekdays looks like this:
a.
6am: Wake up
b.
6am - 8am: devotional time, getting the family ready for
the day and packing all the bags needed by myself and both kids.
c.
8am – 8.30am: School &
daycare drop off, then commute to work
d.
8:30am – 4:00pm: Work
e.
4pm – 5pm: School & Daycare
pickup and taking kids to various extracurricular activities.
f.
5pm – 6pm: get home
g.
6pm – 7:30pm: fix dinner, bath
kids, spend some time playing with them, read and pray with them
h.
7:30 – 8pm: Kids bedtime -My
toddler goes to bed first and so I get an extra half an hour to spend 1:1 time
with my 7 year old.
On a stay-at-home week day, I get up at 6am and leave home at 8.45am for the school run. The extra 45 minutes I have at home on these days are used to do bits and bobs around the house (e.g. taking out the bins etc). After the school run around 9:30am, I spend about 30 minutes doing some cleaning, washing, folding and ironing, while my toddler plays around me. The rest of the morning is spent with my toddler either at a playgroup, aqua babies or just home playing, singing and reading together. After lunch, toddler sleeps while I either do some work, some exercise, house chores or put my feet up with a book and a cup of tea. After the school run, I spend my afternoon playing with both kids and also assisting with home work as and when required. Dinner is always made around 5pm for 6pm. Bedtime routine is the same as other days.
On a weekend, I stay in bed till 7am! Pure luxury! The morning is either spent on children’s extracurricular activities or church. After lunch, apart from a bit of cleaning, and a run, it’s family time of just lounging around together doing nothing in particular apart from being together doing whatever we feel like. It is family time and we play board games, oh and both kids get their hair attended to.
4.
How do you fit housework into
your schedule & do you get the kids involved? I do bits on my days off work
and the big clean is on the Saturday. My husband and I share the big clean
between us so it really lessens the burden. He usually does the bulk of it
while I am out with the kids for extracurricular activities and I finish off
the rest at some point in the afternoon (it usually takes me about 30 minutes
so not too much time out of the precious family time).
My 7 year old has specific responsibilities like helping to wash cars in the
summer months, weeding and dusting while we clean on a Saturday.
5.
What do you find hardest and
most rewarding about being a mum?The hardest thing for me is having to throw
myself into new things and become an ‘expert’ at different things. Amongst many
things, I have had to learn phonics to assist my first child at 4 learning to
read and write. The most rewarding thing about being a mum for me is seeing my
children flourishing and knowing I was a part of that.
6.
What are your thoughts on
choosing Childcare?
We always chose nursery over child minder or nanny. We
always visit the nursery and observe carefully. I believe every parent gets
that gut feeling and knows when they have found the right place for their
child, and of course that is different for each child! We are grateful to say
we have always been happy with our choices of nurseries.
7.
How do you go about meal
planning & what are your top breakfast and dinner recipes for busy days? I
cook on my days off and on weekends. My easiest fallback recipe has got to be
spaghetti Bolognese or any other pasta dish. My quick dinner favourites are:
a.
Frozen soup or leftovers from
the day before (I always cook fresh home-made food on my stay-at-home week day)
b.
Sandwich toasties – ham and
melted cheese ones are a family favourites
c.
Warburton sandwich squares for
ham or chicken sandwiches. I always serve toasties and sandwiches with a
generous helping of plain salad or spinach leaves and tomatoes.
d.
A quick stir fry with vegetable
and noodles (I use pre-packed vegetables and everything takes 5 minutes to
cook)
e.
A couscous meal, which also
takes me 5 minutes to make.
For breakfast recipes, I always go for cereals which are healthy,
nutritious and will keep them full for longer. My kids love Weetabix and
Readybrek, both of which take seconds to make and are low on sugar and salt!
8.
What ways do you balance work,
family & finding time for yourself?
a.
At this stage of my life with
little kids, I understand that I can’t stay back at work like some others can because
I need to pick up the kids from school and daycare, so I schedule some work for
when the kids have gone to sleep.
b.
I try to fit in some exercise
on my stay-at-home days by using the stroller to take the kids to daycare and
school, this way I fit in a 4km walk into my day.
c.
I listen to my favorite
classical music when I drive, this puts me in a nice relaxed mood and makes me
feel like I have done something for ‘me’.
d.
Sometimes my husband takes over
(on weekends) so that I can get some much needed sleep
e.
I try to fit in some time to
read a book with a cup of tea when my toddler sleeps during my stay-at-home
days; but I still find that many days it is a struggle to fit in some ‘me’
time. I understand that this will get easier as the kids grow up so I’m not too
worried.
9.
How did you cope with returning
to work after maternity leave?
After having my first child, I returned to work
fulltime. I learnt that it is quite handy to have a contingency plan in place
so that your partner can take some time off in your first couple of weeks back
at work as kids can get sick within days of starting a new daycare. Knowing
that your partner can stay home with the sick kids helps you focus on getting
back to your career without feeling anxious about asking for time off just
after you have returned from maternity leave. After my second child, I found that it was more beneficial for me and
my family if I returned to work part-time. My advice to any mom would be to assess
your situation putting childcare fees, full-time and part-time work tax into
consideration in order to establish if you will better off returning to work on
a part-time or full-time basis.
10. If you could change one thing in your life right now, what would it
be? I would love to have more time for devotion, reading and exercising.
However, I understand I am in a special season with my little people. The day
will come when I will have all the time in the world to do those things so I am
content and very happy just enjoying my kids for now because their childhood is
so fleeting and I do not want to miss any bit of it.
Wow, it was amazing talking with you, Milly, you are inspiring!
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